Beardgazer

from Evercoop by TOOTILAGE

	/

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lyrics

For the past eleven, twelve years
I was told I looked weird
with facial hair
But last month I cast off my fears
and grew out a beard
it was quite rare
But in the midst of this COVID event
health experts comment
we all should shave
Turned on my razor and away the beard went
but the batteries were spent
it stopped half way

Half of my beard is gone
half of my beard is long
Half of my beard is gone
half of my beard is long

Now I'm told to shelter in place
with this mess on my face
of facial hair
Can't go outside to try and replace
the batteries in the base
of this razor
I'll admit that I don't have the balls
to accept video calls
with this big gap
I've tried tweezers, knives, and lysol
but nothing can maul
through this chin hat

Half of my beard is gone
half of my beard is long
Half of my beard is gone
half of my beard is long

credits

from Evercoop, released November 6, 2020
Song and Lyrics by Ace Salisbury
Vocals, Guitar, Bass, and Drums by Ace Salisbury
Mixed by Ian Turner
Mastered by Magdalena Piotrowska
Produced by Donovan Dwyer

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about

TOOTILAGE New York

Tootilage is what happens when some 90s alt rock-obsessed guys team up with a comedian to make music. Guitarist-vocalist Ace Salisbury, bassist Donovan Dwyer, and wildman Max Rafferty formed Tootilage in 2014 in Brooklyn, NY, and the result was an explosion of sonic nostalgia with an absurdist twist. Stupidly relatable, deceptively profound, and probably hungry, Tootilage is here to rock. ... more

tootilage.com

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